Tips for a Successful Dating Profile Makeover

Is your online dating profile interesting? Are you attracting the right people?

Since most profiles are boring, and many people complain about attracting the wrong person, I decided it’s the perfect time to put together a reference guide to help get you started on writing your new profile. Then, with a little help from our experts, you’ll learn how to attract that special someone. But before you get started I would like to direct you to 3 articles that will help you gain the  perspective needed to help you organize your thoughts.

The first article is called “Write Your Dating Profile with a Smile”.  Back in March of  2009 I had the pleasure of interviewing Yvonne Rice. Yvonne is an author; as well as,  a consultant to various global law enforcement and government agencies for online safety and Internet scams that are directed at the singles dating, chat room and social networking industries. Amongst other things, I asked Yvonne what are five things that a reader can do right after reading this article to improve their online dating profile?

Yvonne’s response:

1. Be honest in what you write about yourself – think of how you would feel if someone lied to you. Keep all personal information including anything about your family, children (if you have them) financial situation or anything else that you wouldn’t tell a stranger you met on the street to yourself– remember everyone online is a stranger until you physically meet them.
2. Have a photo of yourself and make sure it is no older than 6 months old – no matter what you think you look like. There is someone out there looking for you – so, how are they supposed to find you if you are hidden? Profiles with photos displayed have 15 times more hits than one’s that don’t. So, go for it! You are looking to find “The One.”
3. Make sure the photo of you is against a blank wall and it only has you in it – you don’t want to attract someone who thinks you might be a good target to rip-off. Or lose someone because they think they may come second best to “Fluffy” or the fish you caught.
4. Avoid listing all the things you WON”T tolerate – it’s really off-putting. It can come across as you being a control freak, demanding, high-maintenance, loony, just to mention as few – which I’m sure in real life you are not.
5. Write or re-write your profile with a smile on your face, think of the possibilities that lay in front of you by being on the site and what your life will look like to you when you find that person for you– you will be amazed at the difference it makes.

Next, I would like to direct you to an article titled “Enhance Your Dating Experience”   In April of 2009 I interviewed Bob Nicoll. Bob has a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology, a Master’s in Counseling and over thirty years experience studying word choice and articulation. Bob authored Remember the Ice and Other Paradigm Shifts , which is “a comprehensive program that teaches you to enhance your communication skills with family members, friends, co-workers—anyone who is important to you. It helps you stay focused on your task and accomplish more goals because you are conveying your message, and articulating your thoughts in a clear, precise manner. You eliminate confusion and gain confidence in your message and ultimately attract more of what you want.” I thought this is perfect for someone writing an online dating profile because the objective is to effectively attract the person you want. Bob met his wife on an online dating site and in this article he shares with us the body of his successful profile.

Bob’s profile:

“Seeking a romantic partner for many moonlit walks, cerebral conversation and more…..”

“Hi, romantic gentleman seeking a companion for a long term relationship. Love spending a weekend at a bed-and-breakfast on the spur of the moment, or taking in a sporting event, or going for a moonlit walk, or an evening snuggled up on the couch and watching a romantic movie…. or dressing up for a wonderful night of dinner and dancing… I know there is a very special lady out there who would like to be cherished and appreciated… Maybe we are playing touch football and end up in each other’s arms…. with that, “you know…. special eye gaze…. the one that leads to an innocent kiss….” or we take a drive to the beach and jump off the sand dunes…. or enjoy the excitement of Vegas….or take in a NASCAR race at Texas Motor Speedway… or enjoy each other’s company in a provocative cerebral conversation…or share our joy of knowing Christ and the wonders of His Grace… My education is in Psychology with a Masters in Counseling. I have an extensive sales background and have owned an ice cream restaurant…. would love to share a banana split with you…. (Can tie the cherry stem in a knot, with no hands…..) I love life and seek to enjoy it with a companion who enjoys a wide range of stuff. Have done fire walks with Tony Robbins and sky dived… love to travel (only need Oregon, Washington and Alaska to finish the 50 states). Would you like to help me finish??? Need to return to Stonehenge and London and Limerick, Ireland…. Can be serious and funny back to back…. am devoted to my partners needs… and love to send flowers just because… you are who you are. Let’s connect and see what we can create in the magical moment category. Am looking to make each day a special memory. Come play with me.

My ideal match loves life and is open to spur of the moment travels, engaging cerebral conversations, dressing up for a romantic candlelight dinner, slow dancing… or making snow angels…. I really am seeking someone who would like to be appreciated for who she is. I desire a partner for special moments and memories to be made. Come play with me, and let’s explore life’s challenges together. When the two of us put our heads together, we can create whatever we want. Maybe it is a joint entrepreneurial endeavor… or finding that great bargain at a flea market. Spiritually we can explore the great wonders of His wonderful world. Will you join me for some everlasting magical moments?”

I don’t know about you, but this profile would have had me at hello.

Finally while researching this topic, I stumbled upon an article written for Cupid’s Pulse titled “Is Your Dating Profile a Movie Trailer or a Cereal Box”, and was immediately intrigued. This article has a clever way of conveying the message that your profile is probably boring and in desperate need of a make-over. The author lists 3 steps for success that I would like to share with you.

Steps for Success:

1. Read your current dating profile and mark the boring cereal box phrases.  Make notes on how you can beef them up by being more specific.
2. Find little snippets of your life that show off your character.  Write about those.
3. Don’t be afraid to show yourself off.  Self-confidence is sexy and will draw in exactly the kind of people that are good matches for you.

In addition I would add the following dating profile steps for success:

1. Always remember safety first and never give up information that could be used to steal your identity. Never list your home address or names of family members.
2. Write your dating profile with a smile.
3. Remove the negative words. Not, Don’t, Can’t, Won’t, Wouldn’t, Couldn’t, Shouldn’t.

Now, put a smile on your face, start writing that profile using empowering word choice and make it a movie trailer. Start your online dating journey today and make sure to share your “tips for a successful online dating profile” by commenting in the section below.

Here’s to keeping you Safer in the City,
~Jessica